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2008-01-18
New beginnings - [在瑞典]
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http://laindark.blogbus.com/logs/14098971.html
下周新学期又开始了。又将是日复一日的上课,讨论,报告,论文。
一段段的生活,不断的开始,结束。总是充斥着相识和离开。很多事自然不能想太多。
一个人安安静静的图书馆看着英文。晚上坐着空荡荡的地铁回家。
听着高跟鞋pada pada敲击在路面上的声音,我知道,那是寂寞。
有时它的突然来袭,真能让人承受不了发疯。可是即便有了伴,也一样是寂寞。
既然两个人的寂寞比一个人来得更强大,既然这不是爱,那好吧,我更宁愿孤单。
偶尔找几个朋友聊天,吃饭。前几天有人问我,留学生活苦吗?大家都这么说,可是我从没想过用这个字眼。
不知道是不是太早就离家独自生活。如今对我来说,最大的悲哀是,我不曾想念过去在中国的一切。不自觉常有种何处为家的感觉。
一个人在外头晃荡,听着身旁的人说着瑞典语时,真不知道自己在干嘛。
心血来潮的从一个城市到另一个城市,再从一个国家到另一个国家。
现在这么北,这么空荡的城市,一个人做着以前从没想过要做的事。
生活给你的远远比你想象中的要多。不是么。嗯,下个月我要去报个弗朗明哥舞班。------------------------------------------------------------寂寞分割线theres a point in your life when u get tired of fixing everything and trying to make everyone happy..when u finally decide to QUIT,its not giving up..just realizing u dont need certain people and the bullshit they bring in to your life.tell them to FUCK OFF and ask yourself: what you really want?no one like make a tough decision. but there comes a moment..u really need to make it..u can either take that step forward or turn around and walk away..later u made it and after that moment passed..u can cool off..tell yourself at least u did your best in this way..u cant see sorry to yourself afterwards..u can start to clean up the messes u made before..try to let go of what was...then everything from the new beginnings.even u need to being alone..well..your parents gonna being old and leave u one day..your friends gonna have their own lives..in the end u gonna realize all u really have is youself and nothing can make you feel lonelier than that..so..i mean..thats ok..nobody could not live without nobody in the end..L was right..if u strong enough, then u dont fear anything..including loneliness..just beware, sometimes it causes mistakes.nothing is more important than making yourself happy..life is short. remembered this as well.
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我喜歡你這一篇 也許是感同身受吧
新年快乐南。